Oh, my
darlings, I have been away
so very long - months, is it? Can it be? Yes,
months! I cannot begin to
tell you the things I have endured since then; no, I
really
cannot! Perhaps at some time in the future when I am emotionally,
spiritually stronger, I may be able to do so. But not now, my darlings,
not today....
All my plans for returning home to London went awry, horribly -
horribly - awry. There's been just the most beastly bash up between Ivor and Noël. But I shan't go into it...no. They both wanted -
demanded really - that I star in their new productions, and I found myself brutally crushed betwixt them; how could I be expected to choose? How could anyone? Oh, I really can't even
speak of it. What a hideous position in which to find oneself
. A star - just a simple artist, really - fought over by those two
geniuses, those titans of the theatre. What great screaming rows and floods of tears I have endured.
Oh, ghastly...ghastly...! But please,
please do not ask me to speak of it!
So you see, after all, my darlings, that I am
still here,
languishing in this
very silly Oregon.
And since I do
reste ici, the invitations
will still keep flooding in. I can never get away from all of that. Ah, yes, popularity.... It
can be so taxing. But I did go to the most charming
fête nuptiale last evening. It was held at a lovely Chinese garden here in Portland; who would think they would have such a thing? The weather has been appalling all week, so I rather feared for the poor bride; finding oneself a sodden mass of taffeta and tulle on one's wedding day can make one really
quite cross! Haha! But the weather was benign and the evening most mild.
The garden is all built round a pond with bridges and terraces looping this way and that,
dripping with
chinoiserie. It's all rather on top of itself but in the most charming manner and everything was admirably arranged; there was a
pavillon for drink,
deux pavillons for food, even a
pavillon for the eventual cutting of the
gâteau de noce. Blessedly, we weren't forced to remove our shoes, which I find the most
beastly nuisance. Oh...but perhaps that's only a Japanese custom. I'm not sure; one can hardly be blamed for being confused about all this Oriental business. It's all so very irregular.
There were all manner of lovely places to pose or sit, to drink and dine. The champagne was not
quite my dear
Veuve Clicquot. It was Italian, if you can believe it - I had no idea such a thing existed - but at least it wasn't
domestic and so I am not suffering from it today! I have no idea what we dined upon. None at all. But I expect it was something
Chinese, of course. It was all quite vague and mysterious and not like proper food at all, but really quite surprisingly delicious. Though one does feel more secure with identi
fiable food - and it's sure to wreak havoc with my dainty English digestion. But how funny and whimsical: chopsticks at a wedding! Oh, la!
They hired the most
remarkable musician who played throughout the evening. He sawed away on some sort of strange object: a gourd, a stick, and a few little strings. Very eerie and, well,
Oriental, I suppose. It was the sort of thing one might assume to be migraine-inducing, but I found it very, very lovely. Made me long to throw myself upon a silken divan and smoke opium! Haha! Though, when he swung his way into a very languid version of
Danny Boy, I'm afraid I was a bit alarmed. The Irish may be rather pushy, certainly, but I can't believe they've made it all the way to China! Oh....
I must admit to a bit of a gaffe: I was not properly attired. No. This being Portland -
Oregon! - I assumed it best not to dress to
quite the degree instructed by the invitation. Here, one is forever endeavoring to dress as well as warranted by the occasion and, inevitably, coming up over-dressed; it has been
most embarrassing! So I chose a sweet, summery little frock by an
English couturier. You don't know him. Bright pea-green
crêpe de Venise with white
marjolaines embroidered round the neck and down the sleeves, and a wide flounce of
mousseline de soie. Right as I was leaving for the wedding, I had a mad bit of inspiration and pinned a bunch of wildflowers at the corsage - oh, I
did look pretty! Really, I did! Hardly any jewelry - when I have
so much to choose from - I was, then, a nearly Pre-
Raphaelite vision. A full-blown late-summer vision; I might have been crowned with sheaves of
wheat! Oh, la! And then, wouldn't you just guess, all the other lady-guests trotted in with long gloves and all their best jewelry! The full fig! Imagine my horror, my
chagrin. My only consolation was that I really
did look so charming and fresh. And to be completely honest with you - as I must be - when you're as famous as I, much is necessarily forgiven. Penny has been visiting from
beastly Los Angeles and accompanied me. She was - as always - less calculating in these matters and, therefore, fortuitously, chose a more appropriate toilette. Shell-pink organdy and pearls. And, of course, the delightful
fraîcheur of youth; she looked terribly pretty. Now that her brows have once again been brought to heel.
The ceremony itself was held in the largest
pavillon and was
very touching; everyone weeping and smiling and weeping and laughing and weeping. Oh, most enjoyable. We sat rather near the back. My celebrity can be
such a distraction, of course, so I do try as best I can to lurk about in the background at any
normal gathering. But the distance may have been the cause for my muddle about what actually transpired. Because I never managed to catch a glimpse of the bride. Imagine that! There were all sorts of lovely people up front, on the dais, as it were. A few, dear older ladies at one side. Certainly not brides. No.... One very nice lady who was got up in a pretty green costume; she may have been Chinese - I don't know - but a bride, I think not. And another charming lady, quite chic in brown satin. But brown is
never a color for a bride, not even the most scandalous remarrying divorcée. There were two gentlemen who got up and went on for quite some time, one really rather jolly and the other very sniffly. I have no idea what they were speaking about, but they seemed very,
very serious and emotional, so perhaps they were related to the bride in some way. But where
was she? I was so
very disappointed. I do hope she managed to have a pretty gown, at least - something
imported....
We had more of the Italian champagne - I suppose it isn't champagne if it's not French, but what is it, then? - and some very pretty and delicious cake. Penny was frightfully filled up with all that funny Chinese food - she hasn't any sense where her appetites are concerned, and
always overindulges - so she
begged me to finish her little bit of cake. I thought it only polite that I should....
It was all very nice and refreshing - one always so enjoys a good weep! Haha! And I'm certainly feeling in a most
Oriental mood this day! I wouldn't dare to eat any more of that extraordinary cuisine, and don't expect I'd find any opium to smoke, not round these parts - oh, la! - so I think I'll have my little Malaysian come round and give me a nice bright red nail varnish instead! Oh, yes,
lovely!
Goodbye for now, my dearest darlings!
PS - I never
did find my Schiaparelli hat...!
